Kettlebell Training (You’re Doing It Wrong)

This week’s You’re Doing It Wrong is brought to you by incompetent personal trainers everywhere.

Because you’re not a “personal trainer” unless you’re wearing 2-inch-thick running shoes and do all of your workouts on a stability ball. Come on guys, it’s not functional without  stability ball. Thank you, Globo-Gym’s personal trainers, for giving us functional exercise.

You're Doing It Wrong
Today, we’re going to talk about kettlebells. Along with the sandbag, kettlebells have taken globo-gyms by storm. It’s the hottest, coolest, fastest, most exotic way to lose weight, gain muscle, tone your stomach and butt, and regrow your hair all at the same time.

Enough of that hogwash. There are two types of “styles” to kettlebell training. One is hardstyle, which is based on of ballistics and maximizing tension. The other is girevoy-sport, which is used for competitions and seeks to maximize efficiency. Here’s a video differentiating the two styles:

One’s for short-term explosiveness, the other is for long-term efficiency. You can say it’s power vs. stamina. Regardless, you will see that a trainee will always keep the torso neutral and generate power from the hips and/or knees, with either style of training. This minimizes the risk of back injury.

Both of these styles of kettlebell training are effective. It’s your decision as to which is the most effective for your fitness goals.

If you want to maximize your results with kettlebell training, don’t go to some bozo personal trainer at your local globo gym for instruction. Why would you trust someone to safely teach you something, when the “trainer’s” only knowledge is based on of the outdated crap he had to memorize for the exam that labels him a “certified personal trainer”?
I’ve read online about how many people have done this – going to an unqualified person to learn kettlebell training. I remember one guy on some blog proclaiming kettlebells to be nothing but trouble. He said kettlebell swings would be safer if they were performed slowly, thus making them a combo of a deadlift and front deltoid raise. It sounds like he’s getting his workout advice from Jillian Michaels.

As a side-note, don’t get your fitness advice from Jillian Michaels, you dumb-ass.

Back to the matter at hand. If kettlebell training (performed properly with a neutral spine and using the hips to generate explosiveness) is bad for the back, then deadlifting is bad for the back, and squatting is bad for the knees. ‘Cause, ya’ know, derp.

Next time you want to go train with those “evil, scary, Russian” kettlebells, go find someone qualified from the RKC, StrongFirst, WKC, or IKFF.

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